The Company Holiday Party: Surviving Content Marketing’s Worst Guests
Every company holiday party has *that* guest.
Actually, content marketing has a whole guest list of them.
You’ve seen them. You’ve hired them. You’ve probably been one of them.
They’re not evil, they’re just bad for results.
So let’s do a walkthrough of a company holiday party gone wrong—and the content “guests” you secretly hope can’t make it.
The Keyword Stuffer 🔑
You hear them before you see them.
They can’t finish a sentence without cramming in: “Top B2B SaaS marketing strategy thought leadership growth funnel.”
They think SEO is about repetition, not relevance, and they optimize for bots and forget humans exist.
The result? Content that ranks… and converts absolutely no one.
Takeaway: If your content sounds like it was written for Google instead of buyers, you’ve already lost.
The Trend Chaser 🏃
New outfit every five minutes.
Yesterday it was podcasts.
Today it’s carousels.
Tomorrow it’s whatever the last LinkedIn influencer yelled about.
No strategy. No consistency. No memory of what worked last quarter—just motion without direction.
Takeaway: Trends don’t replace thinking. Strategy beats novelty every time.
The Ghoster 👻
Big smile. Great conversation. Then… nothing.
They generate leads and disappear with no follow-up, no nurture, and no second touch.
Then, they act shocked when pipeline dries up.
Takeaway: If you don’t follow up, you didn’t market. You just collected email addresses.
The AI Alarmist ⏰
They corner people by the bar with all the charisma of a broken bullhorn.
“AI is going to steal your job.” “Content will be meaningless.” “Marketing is doomed.”
They’re loud. They’re dramatic. And they’re usually the least informed person in the room.
Takeaway: Fear is not a strategy. Refusing to learn is how you actually get replaced.
The Over-Sharer 🗣️
They trap unsuspecting partygoers with a 3,000-word monologue.
With no breaks, no structure, and no point.
Their content looks the same—walls of text with no signal, no hierarchy, no respect for attention.
Takeaway: More words don’t equal more value. Clarity wins.
The Clingy Guest 🤗
They won’t let go.
Every sentence ends with: “Book a demo.” “Schedule a call.” “Click here now.”
They don’t build trust. They don’t grab attention. They just grab.
Takeaway: If your CTA shows up before your value does, expect resistance.
The Know-It-All 💭
They know everything except how to answer the actual question.
Their content is packed with information but zero relevance to the buyer’s real problem.
Impressive? Eh. Useless? Most likely.
Takeaway: Authority isn’t how much you know—it’s how precisely you apply it.
And Then There’s AI, the Life of the Party 🎉
AI isn’t the villain or the shortcut artist—and it’s definitely not replacing smart marketers.
It’s the guest who:
- Helps you move faster
- Tightens your thinking
- Sparks better ideas
- Makes execution less painful
AI doesn’t replace strategy. It exposes who never had one.
Used well, it clears the noise so humans can do what they’re best at: Judgment. Creativity. Taste. Decision-making.
That’s the difference.
The Real Holiday Lesson
Bad content isn’t about tools. It’s about behavior.
AI won’t save lazy thinking, but it will reward marketers willing to work smarter.
So before you plan next year’s content, look at who you’re still inviting to the party. And ask yourself: Who needs to go—and who finally deserves a plus-one?
👉 Want to see how Unreal uses AI to make content actually work? Let’s talk.
